Because I can’t let you think we actually have our act together over here, it was high time I posted this year’s Messy House Tour!
I’m mostly excited because this is the easiest post to write all year long. Haha!
Can I tell you a secret? You have to promise not to tell anyone. Our house is never totally mess-free. Ever. Wanna know pretty much every blogger’s dirty little secret? When it comes to taking pretty pictures of decorated living rooms and organized pantries, there’s always some disaster area lurking just outside of the camera frame. (I mean… would you really want to see our mess all the time?)
It’s true. It’s a regular topic of conversation at blogging conferences and blogger friend get-togethers.
So often, I find myself falling into the trap. The one where I’m scrolling through hundreds of gorgeous, perfectly styled homes on Instagram and Pinterest, and I feel a little bit deflated. Because my house doesn’t look like those magazine-worthy pictures on a daily basis.
And I find myself resenting the piles of dirty laundry, the sink full of dishes, the shoes tossed all over that I inevitably trip on. I almost resent my family for just a split second.
It always seems to happen in the fall. It’s when school functions, ballet classes, family weekend trips, and everything busy is at an all-time high. And it’s always this time of year when I have to give myself a reality check.
This is life. And it’s a beautiful life.
So I grabbed my camera, spur of the moment, and I made myself really look at every room in our house exactly the way it was. Sometimes, you have to search to see the blessings, even when they’re right under your nose.
That hamper overflowing with dirty clothes? I’m thankful for it because it means I have loved ones to wear them.
That sink full of dishes? I’m thankful for it because it means my family’s tummies are full.
That messy playroom? I’m thankful for it because it means a little one’s mind is exploring and learning.
That unmade bed? I’m thankful for it because it means we have a roof over our heads and a place to sleep at night, unlike so many others in the world.
All of it reminds me of that Trace Adkins song, “You’re Gonna Miss This”.
One day, our messy little girl will be all grown up and gone. One day, schedules won’t be so chaotic. One day, we’re going to look back and wonder why we even worried about the messes.
We do clean. I promise we don’t live like animals. But grace also goes a long way in this house.
If we have a chance to take a weekend trip to visit relatives, we’re going to take it.
If we have an opportunity to make a great memory, we’re going to do it.
And a messy house isn’t going to derail those moments.
Because we’re going to miss this, every messy inch.
If you’re curious about any of the randomness happening in these rooms, here’s the deal-eo:
- Living Room– 9 times out of 10, this room has a pile of folded laundry somewhere and toys on the floor. It’s right off of the laundry room and playroom, and it’s where everything just ends up smack all around our coffee table.
- Breakfast Nook– Shoes somehow always end up here even though an entry bench with storage baskets is only 10 feet away. Makes total sense, right?
- Kitchen– Also, dishes end up in the sink even though the dishwasher is literally right next to it. Logic in our family runs deep when it comes to dishes. 😉
- Dining Room– Do you know how many times we’ve dined in our dining room? Three times. Other than that, this table is where we sprawl out to do craft projects. (But this room is getting a makeover really soon!)
- My Office– A.K.A. the dumping ground. This room mocks me with a maniacal laugh. It’s the room where we’ve put random junk since Day 1 of moving in when we don’t know where else to put them. Shipping boxes always end up in here since it’s right beside the front door. It’s high time for a purge and yard sale, and eventually we’ll be putting in plenty of storage and an actual desk for me, but ya know… life.
- Master Bedroom– There is somehow always this laundry limbo on our window nook chair. Is it clean, is it dirty? I dunno. Toss it here to decide later. And stuffed animals love to hang out on our bed thanks to a squirmy 5 year-old who likes to crawl in our bed early in the morning.
- Olivia’s Bedroom– She’s decided she likes sleeping at the foot of her bed. Sure. Why not? She has also forbidden me from painting over her purple walls or dressing up her room, so I guess that’s how it’s going to go for now.
- Powder Room– Don’t mind us and Olivia’s teeth brushing station for when we’re trying to rush out the door to school.
- Laundry Room– This laundry pile is so deceiving. Hiding in the corner is always a hamper spilling over.
So that’s our life. It’s not perfect, but it’s ours. And it’s the non-sugar-coated reality that I know so many of us live but don’t share. I hope it encourages you in some way, and if your house is always perfectly clean and 100% tidy every day, feel free to come clean ours next. (Ha! Kidding.)
If you want to see my past Messy House Tours, you can see this one from 2016 and this one from 2015.
Keep being you, friends. And keep giving yourselves grace. Because you’re gonna miss this.
“The autumn trees show us how lovely it is to let things go.”
LOVE this. Thank you. I’m actually stunned a blogger’s kid’s room looks almost as chaotic as mine. Makes me feel a whole lot less dysfunctional 🙂 I appreciate your candor, it took courage to do that for others.
I am so glad to know you are a “real family”! I feel better about my own house now. Your home is beautiful messy or perfect.
We’ve been talking a lot about this lately with our women’s Bible study groups. Most don’t blog, but do view Pinterest and Instagram. They see all these fabulous perfectly “staged” pictures and feel so inadequate. I find myself sharing more and more with these women that they are only seeing exactly what you said, what the person holding the camera chooses for them to see. You don’t see the piles of laundry, toys, etc just outside the frame. I know we all come for the pretty, but sometimes it’s refreshing to see the messy side of things.
Thanks for your candor in sharing.
You have a beautiful home and really appreciate your showing us that it gets messy like everyone else’s too. GREAT job
Love it! The house looks great – messy or not!
We are ALL perfectly imperfect. Thanks for sharing your perfectly respectable mess…although that kinda looks like my house on a good day… 🙂
Love this. Love you. Thanks!
Love your candor………..did I miss a posting as I see a new member of the family in this post. A four legged family member that is. Adorable.
I love this and your transparency about actually “living in a house.” I too believe that there are moments missed by some who decide to stay home and clean house instead of going to do something fun with family. Love you post!
Thank you so much for posting this, Lauren! I just recently started reading your blog, and I love your pretty pictures and projects (your house is gorgeous by the way!), but I also love how so relatable this particular post is. I live in a two-story 1990’s colonial with my family and try really hard to keep it clean and organized, but with a toddler and a puppy, our house looks like this a lot of the time too. Glad to see it’s not just us! 🙂
Thanks for the realism! These are all blessings in disguise!
The first couple of photos I thought, “That’s messy?” Then, I got to the Family Room. Yeah, that’s a beautiful mess, and yes, it means you have love, laughter and life in them there rooms. And, you are so right about having a roof when so many do not. Keeping it real. Now, go clean up!!! XO XO
Hi Lauren! This post was so funny and real. I appreciate the insight that even picture-perfect homes have their moments! Inspired to cut myself some slack (although your house is still gorgeous despite messy laundry!)
OMG love love love the first blog i see the house as IS its not just a house but a home LOL.
Thank you so much! I needed this today. By the end of the week our house inevitably looks like a tornado rolled through and I always wonder what I can do differently so it doesn’t look like chaos. But I guess this is life and I need to just roll with it! Have a great weekend!
I say this in the highest regards… You don’t actually have it all together! You are real, you are happy, you are living a dream. But most of all, you have a grateful heart and that is what the Lord cares most about. Love your messy tour!
Even messy your house is amazing and your photos are incredible.
Funny, I am at the place in my life when it’s quiet and the kids are gone and I really DO keep a relatively straighten home – and it’s too quiet, and too lonely and a little too sad. I entertain friends often to keep the home alive – and I would gladly give up my pristine world to have some more of the chaos of my younger years back. ♥
Have a wonderful weekend.
Since blogging has been a ‘fact’ of life these days, even if we’re only blog readers ;-), I think everyone knows a blogger’s house is like everyone elses: It’s not always perfect…except for photo shoots 😉
As a mother of two grown boys and also a grandmother, I can say that my house had days where everything was awry too when they were little. But we did have some house rules that kept our house looking fairly decent most of the time 😉 I looked back and wondered if I had been too hard on our boys with things like “If you’re done playing with it, put it away before you take out other toys” or “Clean up your room”…and things like that I’m sure many mothers touted to their own children.
But as our boys grew up and made their own choices, we found them both entering the military… their own decisions. We learned from them how hard, strict and life-defining boot camp or basic training is and I felt OK being one of those sorta ‘strict moms’. 😉 I realized that I was probably THE easiest ‘drill sergeant’ our sons ever had! Haha….. See we’d built a basis for them that clearly helped them in later life….or so they tell me now. 😉
Seriously though, there is a fine line between being a household where nothing gets moved/used/played with, etc. and one where chaos reins at all times. As parents we make the decisions that best fit our own families…and that’s as it should be.
I love your home in its “photo worthy” AND its “reality mode”. It says a lovely family lives here that is blessed.
Well said!
Great !! that’s the real Life and, yes, it’s beautiful ♥ this house is living and it’s marvellous ! I say to myself the same things and a french singer, Jean-Jacques Goldman has a song about loneliness where he says “The house so clear, that it is suspect
Like all these places where one does not live
Beings have given way, lost the fight
Things have gained, it’s their territory” 🙁
Now, my 4 children (15, 17 and 21×2) are away during the week, and I like those little memories they leaved behind (provided that it’s clean, of course !)
when they were younger, the bazaar in the play room always made me say “they had a good time to play” before closing the door…
That’s so refreshing to see! Thanks for sharing this with us. I think a lot of people need to see this post! Hurray for real life!
Thank you for your post. I must be emotional because I had tears in my eyes reading this. I miss my messy home with little kids!!! My 3 girls are no longer small and no longer leave their Littlest Pet Shop toys for me to trip over. I miss them rolling on the floor playing and seeing their toys all over the home. They’re almost 16 (twins) and 18 yrs old.
This year I was diagnosed with Cancer and my life flashed before me. I regretted those days and years I couldn’t stand the mess. My life IS hectic and although I always complain, I have learned to embrace it and ask God to give me more hectic years and messes. You’re so right that you will miss it (I LOVE that song), I know I do!! Thankfully, God has given me a second chance and there is no more cancer in my body, so I will continue to live to see my teenage girls’ messes and know that we have a beautiful life, messy house and much love!
Thank you for being real!
What a sweet post! I was thinking the other day about how our house might be clean and neat when all the kids are grown and gone….and that made me so sad! I’m trying to strike the balance of keeping a somewhat tidy yet comfortable home where grace abounds! Thanks for sharing and happy Friday! 🙂
THANK YOU!
Wow your house looks like mine. I do like no mess but that’s not really living this is topical that’s ok. We don’t live in a model home. I used to get upset when people would come for a short visit or to even drop off something. Than I realized that when people come they are coming to see me not my house. I do clean the best I can , I do not get uptight if things are not perfect there is a certain amount of freedom to this. This would be a good bible study. Work on this . Frees you from sterss
It’s not a mess…it’s a working home! We all need to take the perfectionist hat off more often.
Favorite post ever!! Brings a person back to reality! You do get caught up in the perfection of social media, even when you blog yourself and know what happens behind the scenes! It’s important to live your life and not always be perfect. If you have kids and don’t ever has mess then you aren’t living. Thanks for this great post!!
Thank you for showing us a real family. I love the staged things but, in our home it has to be around the way we live. Our web page suffers too there is so much to post and not enough time. Blessings to you from our family to yours.
I absolutely LOVED this post!! As a mother of two grown kids and a Nana to two grandsons ages 5 years old and 3 months old, I can certainly confirm that when Olivia is gone, you will miss the “mess”. But when you become a grandmother you will once again welcome the Legos strewn about the living room floor, odd objects becoming their ninja weapons, blocks that form forts and everything else their little imaginations can conjure up. All those years of picking up after their parent(s) will prepare you for a “I don’t care…messy house”…because it’s one that is filled with life and LOVE! I wouldn’t trade that for anything in the world! Lauren, you are a great mom! Just keep doing what you’re doing! (Even if it means hiding a few things when company is coming over! We all do the same thing! Haha)
A rare true story. My kids are gone and I miss the mess! I have found most blogs misleading……no one can live happily in a perfect house.Show me a perfect house and I’ll show you a boring person. Have fun people!Stop all this renovation and painting and perfect decorated tables. So much work put in for free things!
Thanks for your transparency, Lauren! You’re right that the years fly by and before you know it, your little one is leaving for college or moving out to her own place. We’re empty-nesters but are thankful to have 5 grandkids who come to our house and play with toys and Legos. The important thing in life is people!
Okay, I’m cracking up!! Best post ever in blog land! Loved that you shared something so normal!
Thanks for keeping it real. We have two teenagers who have a ton of friends. So our home is always full. They are always hungry. (Good thing I like to cook!) Our house is messy but it is also full of good stuff like laughter, friends, family, game nights, movie nights, binge watching cuddled on the couch and most importantly – love. One day all of that will be gone and become just memories. We will enjoy this right now and add the picture perfect clean house to our to do list for later. Then we’ll be ready for round two – grand babies!
I did a needlepoint when my first son was born (two more followed) it says: Cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow, for babies grow up we’ve learned to our sorrow. So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep. I’m rocking my baby and baby’s don’t keep. All three are grown and gone. My house is organized and clean (except for animal hair) and it is lonely. Enjoy them now.
Lauren, you are a wonderful writer and you definitely have the right perspective on life! I so enjoy your blog and you sharing your talents and real-life mess! Thanks so much!
You really live! You are not neurotic. You have a lovely family and business. “House Beautiful” has its place…but that is just a part of the overall “us”! Nice job!
“You really live! You are not neurotic.”
You hit the mail on the head!
What fun! Thank you for sharing your messy side with us in your humorous and easy going way! You are right about the song, YOU’RE GOING TO MISS THIS. Children will only grow-up once! Family members aren’t around forever! Our homes will always “clean up nice,” but in the meantime, the message on a toss pillow in my kitchen sums it up, “Sorry about the mess, but we live here!” Thanks for your important message about seeing our dirty laundry, dirty dishes, messy bedrooms as blessings. I have my Grandmother’s old recipe box and in it she had a blessing: “Thank God for dirty dishes, they have a tale to tell. While others may go hungry, we’re eating very well. With home and health and happiness, I shouldn’t want to fuss; For by the stack of evidence, God’s been good to us.” Amen!
Ha! I LOVE your honesty, showing us REAL!
As a grandmother living alone, you’re correct, “you’re gonna miss it”
Your home is more than stuff, it shows LOTS of LOVE – irreplaceable!
I love that! That’s reality when you have kids and pets! Still looks beautiful. Thanks so much for sharing!
Hi Lauren. I absolutely LOVE your candor AND your courage in showing us that it “ain’t a house perfect”. I live alone and MY house looks like yours, only not so pretty. But I say that if there is an adventure to take, a friend in need, or a fun class to take, I’m gonna do it. Life is too short to get caught up in the details of pristine. That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it! Thanks.
Lauren, I appreciate this post! Your humor and your honesty are always refreshing. As a blogger too, yes I fall into the comparison trap b/c my home is certainly far far far from ever being even close to perfect. I buy lots of stuff at yard sales & estate sales on weekends for my online shops & it always gets dropped into piles on tables, around tables, the floor, and on beds. We don’t even eat on tables anymore. It can be discouraging at times, but it’s life, as you say, and thank goodness for my long-suffering hubby, who rarely complains. All the perfect home tours are not reality & are kinda getting old, frankly. I had a blogger say to me this year that there was no place for reality b/c blogger’s homes online should look like a magazine. Mine never does, but I don’t do home tours b/c that’s not my niche. One time I did do a home tour spoof, and I got a whole lot of traffic & interaction from that, like you’re getting. I think people like reality b/c it makes them feel better.
Thank you so much! You don’t know how much I needed this. I have found myself at times getting way too frustrated at the littlest mess trying to keep the house constantly magazine worthy. It really helps knowing that someone who loves a beautiful home also knows how to live well in it!
What an absolutely perfectly wonderful blog post! And just as good, all the previous comments I have read, they are so affirming of appreciating where we are at, messy as it is. The space in your heart when a child leaves the family home is definitely harder to bear than the mess they created through many years.
And funnily enough, I sat down to read this blog after finishing a major clean up of the shared room of our 3rd and 4th children (11 and 8 years old) – and they commented how it was ‘almost fun’ to be doing the cleaning as they got their first re-arrange of the furniture too!
Thanks for keeping it real and reminding us what is really important!
Thank you so much for tis post, because I’ve been working my butt in overtime trying to get my home like so many of you all. Asking myself why want my family help me keep things nice and clean? Things put back in its place. You rock! Thank you again.
What your showing us is your home is lived in by a happy active family. I’ve never found photos of rooms kept in pristine photo perfect condition somewhere I’d like to live let alone love. A kid’s sweater and sneakers left behind near a sofa is a heartwarming sight. A messy stack of magazines topped with an empty small plate and coffee cup says to me.. someone lives and loves here.
What you’ve given us is more precious than any to perfect to be real image of a room. No matter how well it’s decorated. Yours shows the love you put into your home but it also shows the remnants of a family who lives and loves in that home. Congratulations. You’ve crossed that important bridge between photo perfect and perfectly lovingly real. Anyone can do the first.. it takes someone special to do the second.
I am glad you shared reality. I post many pics on Facebook of make-overs and repairs we have done, and I do the same thing. I move the mess to a spot behind the camera. I have 2 grown and married kids and am Nana to 2.5 kids. I keep my grandchildren while my kids work, and my house usually looks like a toy box exploded. We rescue animals, so the dog and cat hair is everywhere (there are NO white sofas in my house!). I am constantly cleaning, yet my house is never totally clean. I don’t think your house is messy at all.
I Love It!
It Looks Beautiful, Because It’s Real Everyday Living!!!
Enjoy!
the pup loves it and doesn’t mind the mess
Oh, yes, I do miss this! That song gets me every single time.
Lauren, your house is so warm and inviting. I don’t see a messy house, I see a house of Love. Cherish each moment.
Bravo, love it! And such a lovely reminder of the really important things in life. Your home is lovely.
Pat
There is a difference in messy and dirty. I couldn’t find a dust bunny anywhere. You are just comfortably messy. I can stand messy but dirty, not so much. HOWEVER my house tends to be both most of the time. My dirt doesn’t bother me too much, as long as nobody else see it. My dear friend would greet you at the door if you made an unexpected visit. “If you are coming to see me, come on in. If you are checking out the house, make an appointment. “
I have no idea where all the mess comes from in my home – we are empty nesters and still have a mess- enjoy the life and worry about the stuff later. No one’s obit or tombstone commends them for their neatness!!!
Lauren I have the same problem. I think we all have this blogger malaise. But I had to crack up when you said Olivia won’t let you paint her room or fix it up. I also had this a few years ago with my girl. Don’t you just hate it when they refuse to see your vision, even if it’s their room? “wink”
Wow! Thank you so very much for the reality check!! I’ve been looking at decorating blogs all day and wondered if anyone really lives in those places. You made me feel so much better about my own living space and it was so very brave of you. It reminds me so much of the days when My kids were little. I regret that i didn’t appreciate the messy house like I should have.
Thanks for sharing. I have been feeling that same anxiety lately. My house has fall decoration totes and papers in counters(even though I have organizers for those).since we moved in a year ago I still do not have anything as organized as I like. Love to see all the projects you guys are working on.
If you call that messy, you’re doing just fine! Love the little canine photo bomber in several of the pics lol
Love the messy home tour…or what most of us call “being real”. Thanks for reminding us that the most important treasure in our homes is our family…even when they can’t seem to find the dishwasher. Love your blog… trying your window trim project… thanks for sharing… and btw…your home is beautiful!
I love all of your posts, but this by far is my favorite. So many of these photos made me think “good, we aren’t the only ones who have that pile/habit/etc.”. I do love a clean home, but I love my family more. Like you mentioned, if we get an opportunity to go out of town or do something together, I will always pick them over the cleaning. I have yet to return home to it having moved or someone coming in to do it for me. It is always right where I left it, waiting for me to return. Thank you for showing us the real side of your beautiful home!
This made me cry. THANK YOU. I live in a constant state of feeling not good enough. I largely blame social media for this. I saw a quote once that said “don’t compare your behind the scenes to others highlight reel”…and there is so much truth in that, because social media is the best of the best. Yet I can’t shake that feeling that everyone else’s life is perfect all the time, not just in the moment it took for them to snap that picture. Thank you for being real.
Thanks for being real. You’re right. You are gonna miss this. I’m living it right now…empty nesting. I can remember when I was hanging clean sports uniforms to dry in my laundry room, thinking that there would be a day I wouldn’t be doing it anymore….how would that feel? I knew at the time I was going to miss it and I was spot on. I miss it terribly. Friday nights free to do whatever we want because we don’t “have” to go to the football game to watch our boys play ball and our daughter cheer. But I’ve come to learn that life is all about change. You do adjust but we need to remember to embrace the stage we are in. Enjoy every minute because you will blink and it will be gone.
You have one child. This was refreshing! I have seen other people’s messy home tours and they were not messy at all.
I have eight children. The messes are exponentially bigger. Mostly, at my house, it’s the sheer amount of laundry, dishes, and pots and pans.
I have always wanted to do home tours. I don’t write a home decor blog but many of my readers have been asking for home decor pics since I share small glimpses of our home. We have an open floor plan, so all rooms show from anywhere. I really would love to share home decor pictures. In fact, I’ve been trying for two weeks to be able to share a fall home tour (which would be my first ever) but as soon as I turn around there are another 20 pots and pans needing to be washed (a normal amount in the day here as we cook 3 meals plus snacks at home for 10 people a day). We also live in a dry climate, where you have to dust every day (otherwise, I can write my name in the dust three times a week on top of the piano!)
The biggest surprise for me in reading blogs has been reading that many bloggers clean their children’s rooms for them! My mother never did this for me, and I have never done this for my own children. I don’t know if it’s just because they wanted to get a photo that day, or if this is a regular occurrence.
Thank you for sharing!
Thank. You. I reeeeeallllyyy needed that! 🙂
Ha! Lauren, Your messy house tour may be my favorite! While I love your blog for the awesome decor and help in making my own home”picture perfect”,I absolutely adored your candor and keepin’ it real addition to my day. Funny thing. I promised myself this sesh on the internet was going to be a quick price check for an IKEA farm sink! Through the rabbit hole that is Pinterest, and only God knows where else, I landed smack dab in the middle of your dirty little secret! And. I. Loved. It. Thanks so much for reminding me of the important things in life.
I want to thank you all for your candor. I no longer have children at home. But i still need to be reminded of what is most important.. My living room is missing a couch because it has a hospital bed in its place and is cluttered with medical equipment and supplies as I am caring for a sick spouse. The alternative is not something I am looking forward to. Again, Thank you all!!
Laura,
would you please tell me what color and brand the blue is in your laundry room?
thank you
Chris
Hi Chris. It’s Sherwin Williams Slate Tile.
Thank you SO MUCH for sharing your reality with all of us! Sometimes I get to feeling like I’m not measuring up because I have piles of laundry in the bedrooms, and stacks of mail and half-completed crafts covering my dining room table most days. I have always wondered if the bloggers I’m following actually LIVE in the beautiful homes they share with us online. Now I know! 🙂
Oh Thank goodness this give me hope through our own home renovation. I just feel like I can never catch up with a 5 yr old and 1yr old tearing apart every inch of this house while I work on a home project with my husband. Thank you for showing me I’m not alone and that you’re actually a REAL person!!!! Lol. Your home is really coming along and I’m enjoying all your awesome ideas which are very similar to my own. I stumbled upon a picture of your floral wallpaper in the bathroom and had just found the exact same pattern prior to use in my own and since then I’ve been following you on Pinterest. Can’t wait to see more inspiration from your blog!
Yes, I am definitely real and there are seasons to life. Enjoy your kids and eventually, the house will come along. 🙂 Hang in there!
That was a most refreshing view! Because “life lives here” I love clean and I do every blasted day. But we breathe and eat an live an laugh and cry and scold and love and play! With six kids an grand babies I’m in constant motion to keep things in order because it helps bring peace for all;) thanks for letting me share? your amazing an I love your story!
Sincerely Amy
~TheAbbyHouse ~
So glad you enjoyed! Enjoy those grandbabies while they are little. 🙂